Adoption


Ten new things I have experienced with Kayeso in the last month
10. His favorite color is orange, or he just loves saying orange I don’t know.
9. He loves to describe whether we are inside or outside and the temperature of the weather hot or cold.
8. Kayeso is learning his letters and numbers. He drew a y for the first time today.
7. Kayeso loves to watch the same shows over and over right now. He mostly likes Curious George and Cailou.
He is upset because Yordie doesn’t want to be Rosie when he plays Cailou. She says, “I’m not a baby.”
6. Thursdays he spends time with my parents, Nana and Papa, so instead of it being Thursday it is Papa Day when he wakes up. Nana is a little bummed.
5. His favorite phrase is “Kayeso do it.”
4. Kayeso rode a skateboard for the first time and loved it.
3. Kayeso loves to eat at Carl’s Junior. He starts saying “Happy Happy Happy”as we approach.
2. Kayeso loved Easter. He talked about his basket for two weeks before Easter everyday. He wanted to know when it would be Basket Day.
1. Kayeso turns 5 on May 18th. We are having breakfast with Elmo and Friends at Sea World for his Birthday.  He says on Elmo Day Kayeso is 5.

We went and got our court date on Friday for the readoption.It will be May 14th. Wow how quick. For those in California you can definitely do it yourself

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People often ask Brian and I how it is communicating with an older child in the first few weeks home. I have realized that although at times it is challenging it is also not a major obstacle. You can communicate with Amharic that you know, and hand signals are key in the early weeks. Many things are just understood through nonverbal communication.

I watched my new 4 year old son playing in the yard at my parents’ house today with my 3 1/2 year old daughter. As they played and talked to each other language was not important. They enjoyed being together, and they enjoyed each other as people even though they don’t speak the same language. Their laughter and smiles said so much. The brother my daughter had wished for was now here with her, and that was all that is important.

10. His excitement on riding on a flying mechana “an airplane.” It looks like a flying car.
9. Turning on and off Light switches 100 times a day.
8. Wearing our shoes to bed. Can’t take off those Elmo shoes Mom gave us.
7. His obession with watching the Food Network 24 hours a day.
6. Looking at himself in every mirror possible.
5. His first experience with self flushing toilets.
4. Learning how to use a drinking fountain, and that we don’t wash our hands in it.
3. The look on his face when he learned that his sandles light up.
2. Riding the escalator 100 million times at the Washington airport.
1. Watching his love for glow sticks at our neighbor’s New Year’s Party last night.
I am so glad to have my baby home with us, and that we have completed our family. I am just trying to enjoy every minute in the chaos with my 4 beautiful children.

I feel like we are running a marathon.  We are leaving in 5 days to go get Kayeso.  We both go through the range of emotions on a daily basis.  We are excited, then anxious, constantly stressed, scared, hopeful, and excited again. 

We are getting on a plane Thursday night after we have both worked up until hours before we leave.  We have had to get everything ready for the kids for Christmas.  They will miss us while we are away, but excited to spend the holidays with their grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins.  They also opened their Wii from us last night which made everything okay of course.

As we embark on this last adoption I am excited for the future.  Although I know it will be tiring to have 4 kids that range in age from 3-7 I know our family will be amazing.  I am so excited to meet my new son, and hold him for the first time.  What more could I have asked for for Christmas this year.

I read Estifanos Oh The Places You Will Go the other night, and when I got to the part about the Waiting Place it hit home.  The whole book actually hit home.  On any given day I feel excitement for Kayeso to come home, happiness for him to join our family and to be his Mom, sadness he is not here yet,  and anxiety about his needs and caring for four children.

Are we ready?  Are we prepared?  Are the kids ready?  Are the kids prepared?  How do I feel?  How does Brian feel?  How do the kids feel?  These are all questions that we are asked about a zillion times a day, and that I think about from the moment I wake up til my head hits the pillow.  When I am at a soccer game, making lunches, at work, a dance class, church, or in he quiet of the night I think about how life will be different in less than three months.

Are we all ready?  We talk about it on a daily basis, but I don’t know if you are ever fully ready.  Who knows what the future holds.  I am just ready to stop waiting and get to travel to get my son, and begin our journey as a complete family.

I was reminded this past couple of weeks how blessed we are to be a part of the Ethiopian community, and the amazing culture our kids come from.

It has been a hectic few weeks with school starting, soccer in full swing with Brian coaching both teams, gymnastics, dance, church activities, preparing to travel to bring Kayeso home in a couple of short months, oh and don’t forget that thing called work.  In the midst of all these hectic times at moments I am reminded of our kids’ culture and the amazing Ethiopian people that we get to meet and share with frequently.

A couple of weeks ago we were at an Ethiopian adoption picnic with all familes who have adopted in southern California mostly San Diego.  It is amazing to watch this younger generation of Ethiopian-American kids as the grow into themselves each time I see them. 

Brian went to get gas for our BBQ at the gas station, and he asked, “Where is a picture of Kayeso?”  The lady who works at the gas station immigrated here many years ago from Ethiopia and adores our kids. 

We went out to eat at the local Ethiopian restaurant last night, and the young man in his 20’s had  certain fondness for Yordie because his sister’s name is also Yordanos.  My kids were like there is a, “big Ethiopian kid.” 

 Last but definitely not least there is the young man who works at my dad’s office who adores our kids. His mom who we have never met is making Kayeso and our other kids a present that we are not sure exactly what it is, but we are so excited to get. 

We are so grateful to the Ethiopian community here for their support of our family, and for them reminding our kids where they came from and who they are.  In a world of school, sports, friends, and media it is easy to forget where you came from.  It is special to have mentors in their lives besides us to remind them of their journey, and what makes them who they are.

We are so excited!  We were matched today with our son. Kayeso just turned four years old.  We have been working on getting matched for a couple of weeks, but he needed paperwork, and we did also.  Tonight we told our kids, and showed them pictures of him, and it all became real.  Our family is complete.

I think the thing Brian and I have learned from this experience is the importance of people considering adopting a waiting child.  It amazes us that people wait close to a year for a two year old when you could adopt a waiting child who is just slightly older.  Estifanos who came home at 3 1/2 does not remembers very little about Ethiopia, and blends his few memories of his first mom with me.  All children need homes, and they are all just babies. 

I had planned on adopting a two year old, but I am so excited to have my beautiful son.  Life isn’t always what we plan.  I hadn’t planned on Yordie, I hadn’t planned on adopting siblings, and I hadn’t initially planned on Ethiopia, but I guess life can’t be about plans.  Three years ago I was a married woman with no kids who wanted a family, and thought maybe someday I will be blessed with one or two.    Now I am blessed with four amazing kids ranging in age from 3-7.  Some say we are crazy.   

I feel blessed to be Kayeso’s mom.  As I go to bed tonight I know who my son is, and I am so excited to meet him, hold him, play with him, bring him home, and start our life together.  I hope he knows tonight that he has a mom, dad, 2 sisters, a brother, and so many other people who already love him.

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